Maybe it’s because I’m an only child, but I require alone time to myself, so I love taking myself out on little dates, even though I’m happily married. Recently I took myself to a book signing and before it started I went across the street to a little wine shop and ordered a cheeseboard and prosecco, and spent an hour writing and dashing off a letter to a friend. ❤️
omg vicki this is the best thing i've heard!!! that truly sounds like the ideal solo date. i'm so happy to hear it! i think spending time with yourself is so crucial, no matter what your life looks like. you've got it exactly right. 💛
ugh my heart.. experiencing the quiet unraveling of friendships and group dynamics you once cherished, is such a heartbreak </3 this all resonated so deeply for me. i’ve been thruuu it and i yearn so much for this perfect friend group again. but this feels like a gentle reminder to take the pressure off myself (and others) and do more things alone! because im really the rock in my life and its okay to have only a few others 🪨✨ more besties will come along and be part of the future chapters we’re entering. and it’s okay for things to look different today. have to love who’s here rn 💗
i feel you so much, adriana. it really is a special kind of heartbreak. idk what it is, but friendships feel so indestructible, and then when life happens and proves they're not... it can be so hard to accept or even understand. i also believe that when you start spending more time alone, you realize what you like to do, which makes it easier to find other like-minded people! it's a win-win. cheers to loving yourself exactly where you're at! the future is bright. wishing you the very best 💛
that's so true; i've done that a lot in the past - made my relationships the center of my world. but that made me keep waiting for others to make my life happen. i genuinely think that if you let go of the pressure that the relationships "should" be everything to you, and instead be your own everything, it's easier for friendships to add something to your life rather than be a source of pain and anxiety. i hope that makes sense. wishing you the best. <3
Thanks for you honesty and openness here. It's a quiet type of heartache, and I'm happy you found yourself in the process. With that you're being able to be a good friend to others, and realizing that is amazing. Beautiful piece ❤️ ps: I love to go solo shopping. So fun.
thank you so much, jolene, truly!! 🤍 i love how you called it "a quiet type of heartache." that's exactly what it feels like. and yes to solo shopping!! i always use my solo dates as an excuse to go shopping lol. but it's always a good time, isn't it? wishing you a beautiful week. 💛
This is this is very relevant to me right now as I am exploring my trauma history and setting strong boundaries with other others. It seems that some folks don’t like when you set boundaries with them. Thank you for this.
thank you so much for reading, nicole, and for sharing this. <3 setting boundaries can be so hard, especially when people aren't used to them. i'm really glad you're choosing yourself, even when it's uncomfortable. i'm rooting for you. 💌
This hit hard. I was just thinking about a friend I lost a couple years ago. There was no argument, no drama, just a silent ending. And honestly that makes it even harder to live with
Sofia, this was so lovely! As someone who's also in my mid-20s trying to figure out how to deal with friends I was close to but who I don't see anymore, this piece made me feel seen <3
Sofia, this gives such honest language to the heartbreak of being the friend who keeps inviting, keeps reaching, and slowly begins wondering whether someone else’s response has become a referendum on her worth. The dried-up group chat, the sitcom-coded friend group, the dream of neighbors with wine, and the weekly solo dates all trace the movement from waiting to self-companionship with real care. The strongest turn is how you show self-friendship freeing other friendships from carrying a weight they could never safely hold. Grateful for the honesty, self-trust, and gentle permission in this piece.
This resonated so much. I was always the floater friend. Overthinking, stressing if I would get an invite and, if I did, feeling welcome but out of place once I was there. Your words really connected with me. Made me feel seen. And also made me appreciate the times I spend with myself.
That idea of going on one solo date a week is so lovely. It’s definitely a hard pill to swallow at first that we can't get everything we need from others, but it’s honestly such a relief to stop treating every unanswered text like a personal failure. Hope your next solo date is a good one, Sofia!
i loved this one, thank you for sharing it ♥️ and i resonate with it so much, because my early twenties were also spent away from all my high school friends, in another city, and i hadn’t found the “right” people - the ones i was looking for - for the first three years. and what i’ve learned in my almost 33 years is that it’s so important to have a loving relationship with yourself, it makes life so much easier. Agreeing with everything you said I guess 🫶🏻
The line about longing and waiting quietly stealing the present hit home with a thud. I think there’s a balance to be found between treasuring the people we love and remembering not to put our own life on hold while we’re waiting for everyone else’s diary to align. Sometimes the bravest thing we can do is just keep living. X
This piece hit me right in the heart, Sofia. Thank you for putting such tender, honest words to that quiet heartbreak of watching your closest friends move on.
Maybe it’s because I’m an only child, but I require alone time to myself, so I love taking myself out on little dates, even though I’m happily married. Recently I took myself to a book signing and before it started I went across the street to a little wine shop and ordered a cheeseboard and prosecco, and spent an hour writing and dashing off a letter to a friend. ❤️
omg vicki this is the best thing i've heard!!! that truly sounds like the ideal solo date. i'm so happy to hear it! i think spending time with yourself is so crucial, no matter what your life looks like. you've got it exactly right. 💛
It was actually a lot of fun and I realized I should probably do that more often!
This resonates me so much! Thank you so much for writing this Sofia❤️.
i’m so glad we could connect. thank you so, so much for reading, and i’m glad these words met you where you are. 💛
ugh my heart.. experiencing the quiet unraveling of friendships and group dynamics you once cherished, is such a heartbreak </3 this all resonated so deeply for me. i’ve been thruuu it and i yearn so much for this perfect friend group again. but this feels like a gentle reminder to take the pressure off myself (and others) and do more things alone! because im really the rock in my life and its okay to have only a few others 🪨✨ more besties will come along and be part of the future chapters we’re entering. and it’s okay for things to look different today. have to love who’s here rn 💗
i feel you so much, adriana. it really is a special kind of heartbreak. idk what it is, but friendships feel so indestructible, and then when life happens and proves they're not... it can be so hard to accept or even understand. i also believe that when you start spending more time alone, you realize what you like to do, which makes it easier to find other like-minded people! it's a win-win. cheers to loving yourself exactly where you're at! the future is bright. wishing you the very best 💛
It’s heartbroken with others are moving on without you
truly, it’s such a hard thing to manage. sending you my love today. thank you for reading. 💌
Wow I resonated with so much of this, thank you so much Sofia for putting words to so much of what I’ve felt and been through too.
It’s so easy to make relationships the center of your world and wait around until everything aligns but there’s also so much life to be lived. 💕
thank you so, so much for reading, lauren! 💛
that's so true; i've done that a lot in the past - made my relationships the center of my world. but that made me keep waiting for others to make my life happen. i genuinely think that if you let go of the pressure that the relationships "should" be everything to you, and instead be your own everything, it's easier for friendships to add something to your life rather than be a source of pain and anxiety. i hope that makes sense. wishing you the best. <3
Thanks for you honesty and openness here. It's a quiet type of heartache, and I'm happy you found yourself in the process. With that you're being able to be a good friend to others, and realizing that is amazing. Beautiful piece ❤️ ps: I love to go solo shopping. So fun.
thank you so much, jolene, truly!! 🤍 i love how you called it "a quiet type of heartache." that's exactly what it feels like. and yes to solo shopping!! i always use my solo dates as an excuse to go shopping lol. but it's always a good time, isn't it? wishing you a beautiful week. 💛
This is this is very relevant to me right now as I am exploring my trauma history and setting strong boundaries with other others. It seems that some folks don’t like when you set boundaries with them. Thank you for this.
thank you so much for reading, nicole, and for sharing this. <3 setting boundaries can be so hard, especially when people aren't used to them. i'm really glad you're choosing yourself, even when it's uncomfortable. i'm rooting for you. 💌
Thank you 😊
This hit hard. I was just thinking about a friend I lost a couple years ago. There was no argument, no drama, just a silent ending. And honestly that makes it even harder to live with
Sofia, this was so lovely! As someone who's also in my mid-20s trying to figure out how to deal with friends I was close to but who I don't see anymore, this piece made me feel seen <3
Sofia this is so, so beautiful. This part gave me chills!!
"Love and friendship are terrifying—if you let someone else’s actions speak for your worth.
Because then you’re not just afraid of being abandoned. You’re afraid of what their leaving will say about you.
If we’re not careful, someone else’s decision can make us change how we see ourselves."
Ooooooof. Thank you for this beautiful honesty. 💖
Sofia, this gives such honest language to the heartbreak of being the friend who keeps inviting, keeps reaching, and slowly begins wondering whether someone else’s response has become a referendum on her worth. The dried-up group chat, the sitcom-coded friend group, the dream of neighbors with wine, and the weekly solo dates all trace the movement from waiting to self-companionship with real care. The strongest turn is how you show self-friendship freeing other friendships from carrying a weight they could never safely hold. Grateful for the honesty, self-trust, and gentle permission in this piece.
This resonated so much. I was always the floater friend. Overthinking, stressing if I would get an invite and, if I did, feeling welcome but out of place once I was there. Your words really connected with me. Made me feel seen. And also made me appreciate the times I spend with myself.
That idea of going on one solo date a week is so lovely. It’s definitely a hard pill to swallow at first that we can't get everything we need from others, but it’s honestly such a relief to stop treating every unanswered text like a personal failure. Hope your next solo date is a good one, Sofia!
i loved this one, thank you for sharing it ♥️ and i resonate with it so much, because my early twenties were also spent away from all my high school friends, in another city, and i hadn’t found the “right” people - the ones i was looking for - for the first three years. and what i’ve learned in my almost 33 years is that it’s so important to have a loving relationship with yourself, it makes life so much easier. Agreeing with everything you said I guess 🫶🏻
The line about longing and waiting quietly stealing the present hit home with a thud. I think there’s a balance to be found between treasuring the people we love and remembering not to put our own life on hold while we’re waiting for everyone else’s diary to align. Sometimes the bravest thing we can do is just keep living. X
This piece hit me right in the heart, Sofia. Thank you for putting such tender, honest words to that quiet heartbreak of watching your closest friends move on.